Well, I, for one, am thankful that Eric will “stop discussion [sic] the gay perspective.”
(I have often wondered if English is Eric’s first language. For his sake, I hope it’s not. As I see it, his only redeeming quality is that he, on
rare occasion, actually makes a substantive contribution to this forum that addresses distance education.)
Be that as it may, his willingness to leave this topic alone frees me up to pursue the homosexual agenda with renewed fervor.
What, you didn’t know that we have an agenda? Well, we do. And that is to turn the entire world homosexual. It’s our contribution to population control and overcrowding.
As many know, I used to teach and write books. Then one day, I was asked by senior-level members of the homosexual agenda to represent them to the trucking profession. “But,” I replied, “most truckers are morbidly overweight and butt ugly.”
“True,” they answered, “but you don’t have to bother with them. Just recruit the hot-looking truckers to the homosexual agenda. We want guys who will look good once they convert to our agenda and begin to shop at Bloomingdale’s. Don’t bother with the guys who would never fit into an Abercrombie t-shirt.”
Okay, I said, and began the task of recruiting truckers to the homosexual agenda. I’ve become a specialist – focusing on hot married guys who get drunk on holiday weekends because they’re out on the road and miss their wives and kids.
I also go after right-wing redneck truckers that listen to Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck as they travel the nation’s highways and byways. Once I’m done with them, not only are they homosexual, they’re ready to vote for Obama and Hillary. Not to mention that they stop listening to country & western and start tuning their Sirius XM satellite radios to the Broadway channel. I know I have them captured by the homosexual agenda when they start doing Ethel Merman impressions.
I tell straight guys that, while I understand their desire for women, guys have less baggage. You’ll never hear a guy say to you, “I want to marry you.” (On the other hand, as time marches on, you
will hear that… in
some states.)
But then I tell them that they’ll never hear a guy say, “I want to have your baby.” (Unless he’s very kinky and has a warped fantasy life.) But you
will hear women say that. And if they do, it means they
can. And if they have your baby, congratulations: you now have a 21-year investment.
Then there are the straight truckers that spend their money on lot lizards (truckstop prostitutes). They’re the ones that are easy to win over to the homosexual agenda – when they realize that they won’t have to pay guys for sex, leaving them more money to waste on lottery tickets.
Yes, ever since I became an over-the-road driver, I’ve recruited hundreds of other drivers to the homosexual agenda. So if Eric has any friends or relatives who are truckers, he'd better watch out. Because if I meet them,
they will become homosexuals and batter him with the same bullshit with which he is battering us.

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Is all of this true, or merely a satire? I'll never tell...